I want to start off by apologizing for posting a day late. Things weren’t the greatest emotionally, and I didn’t want to put something up when I knew it wouldn’t be good quality.
But as I couldn’t sleep last night, I decided to pull this together and go ahead and share it a day late.
Adoption (as a whole).
Adoption is not what it used to be. The birthmother doesn’t just give her child away and never have contact with them or their adoptive family again. (Well, sometimes that happens, but that’s their choice.)
Now that majority of society seems to have a different opinion of birthmoms, we have closed, semi-open, and open adoptions.
Closed adoptions are pretty much what they sound like. Once the baby is born, the birthmom no longer has access to the child or the adoptive family. The door to that part of her life is closed.
Open adoption gives the birthmom (and birthfather) and the adoptive family access to contact each other as they wish. This contact could include, but is not limited to: emails, visits, texts, and phone calls. But even with that, you have to remember that every open adoption is going to look different.
Semi-open adoption is kind of like a middleground, a compromise, between the two. The birthmom and adoptive family are able to contact each other, but the contact must go through a third party or agency. If visits are involved, typically there is someone from said third party/agency present.
There are several misconceptions in society about women who make adoption plans for their children. A lot of them come from the fact that people don’t talk about this side of the adoption the same way that they they do the adoptive family’s side.
Not all birthmoms are drug addicts or alcoholics. Sometimes they’re just girls who aren’t ready to parent. They may just not in a position to take care of a child.
These ladies aren’t being selfish when making these adoption plans – they’re putting their son/daughter above themselves. They are more concerned with their child having everything they deserve than they are with what they want for themselves.
Despite what you may think because she gave up parental rights for her child, she does miss him/her. There’s no denying that she formed a bond of some kind during the nine months she carried her child.
There will be a second installment in this Adoption Misconceptions coming later in the future.